Try Again?
by Nanospeed
Summary: FE7 Crack - Guy is aware that he is a video game character and proceeds to arena abuse, only to be RNG screwed...


Sorry that I haven't been around for awhile, I had mid-terms and school comes first. Anyways are you are wondering what my future plans are? I plan to make a Colm and Neimi story (AU- Zombie Apocalypse) and a Marth and Catria story (honestly that pairing gets no love). So would I continue with my current story (Let Hope Light Your Way)? Yes, as the ones I plan to work on are bigger projects and will be released monthly. Make sure to subscribe so you know when they come out.

In the meantime, enjoy this crack fic of Guy, who seems to break the fourth wall.

**Arena Abuse**

"I am going to be the best swordsman in all of Sacae," those were the words and dream of a certain boy from the plains. And he exactly new how to do so... all he needed was to become level 20.

Dressed in a fancy, yet comfortable looking robe. He was so close, already a swords master and just one experience point away, his goal was right ahead of him.

"Welcome to the arena!" It was the gruff voice of a man. Guy always found it weird how the arena keeper looked the same, despite being at a different arena at the other side of the continent. The man always used the same words, his speech never changed even after a hundred battles.

"Hello," Guy responded with an impatient huff. He already knew the drill.

"Would you like to wager 200 gold?" The man continued, completely ignoring Guys response. It was like he was automated or something.

Guy blinked in confusion. 200 gold? That was so small considering he was a level 19, tier 2 unit. Then again at 99 experience and only needing one more, he actually didn't mind.

"Sure," Guy responded after some thought.

"Right this way please," the man said, pointing down the hallway. The boy wondered if the arena keeper needed to eat, drink, use the washroom... Basic activities of a normal person. He always seemed to sit in a booth. Heck, he didn't even notice a door in or out.

Shrugging it off, he walked through the hall, past the lobby and into the expanse known as the arena. The crowds cheered seeing their favourite. Even over a hundred battles in one night (which Guy had no idea how it was possible), there still seemed to be every spectator in every single seat.

"Okay," Guy muttered, unsheathing his iron sword. He wished he could had brought a better one, but whatever, arena rules were rules.

Suddenly the arena fell silent as the challenger walked in. He was dressed in light armour and carried a small, almost pathetic looking iron spear. To defend himself, he had a small buckler that looked so frail it, looked like a pan-lid. It was a soldier, the easiest unit and enemy in the game.

"Are you serious?" Guy muttered. His expression showed utter disbelief.

"What?" The soldier replied in innocently as he approached.

"Nothing," Guy replied. That certainly explained why the wager was so low. This opponent had to be a joke right, there must be someone stronger.

"Whenever you are ready," the spearman replied as he took his stance. Wait, that was a stance right? He couldn't tell, based on how... sloppy it looked.

"Okay, I'll make this clean and swift," it was the least Guy could do to show mercy to this poor soul.

Almost disappearing in a blur of light, he dashed at his opponent and stopped. To any spectator, he looked like he just teleported a great distance.

The soldier stared at him, unamused. Maybe he was so fast, he didn't ever register the threat right in front of him. Guy, then proceeded to thrust his sword through the man while avoiding his vital spots. That should be enough to finish the fight.

"Is that all?" The soldier asked. Seemly unfazed by the attack.

Guy blinked, "What?"

The soldier huffed, "I said... is that all?"

"I know what you said!" Guy replied. "It's just, that theres a sword in you and your not unconscious, let alone in pain."

"I am in pain," his opponent replied calmly as he thrust his spear into Guys stomach.

"Argh!" Guy gritted his teeth in pain, as he removed his sword from the soldier. His opponent did likewise.

"No matter," Guy replied. "I will finish it with this!"

The swords-master proceeded to counter, this time aiming for the head. He didn't know what was going on, but one thing he did know was that none of his past opponents ever stood up to two attacks (unless he was a Beserker and had high hit-points).

"Heres a tip, lances are best swords," the man replied, almost cheerfully.

Guy blinked, "How... Theres a sword in your head. How are you alive."

"Do I look dead to you?" The soldier replied.

"No but, GAH!" Another wave of excruciating pain exploded in his chest as his opponent ran his spear through him. That was it, he could no longer go on physically.

"Screw you," Guy muttered with his last breath (he felt completely out of character as he cursed). "I have save states.

* * *

Guy opened his eyes. He knew he wasn't dead, he was just at his last save point. Wasting no time, he ran into the arena.

"Welcome to the arena!" The gruff voice of the arena keeper again.

"Yeah, yeah..." Guy said as he impatiently ran past. He didn't know how he was beaten, but surely it must have been a fluke.

He entered the arena again to find the very same opponent. Since Guy went back to the last save point, the soldier wouldn't remember what happened before.

"Welcome back!" The soldier greeted. Waving around a steel spear.

On second thought, maybe not. Something was off about this soldier, but it wouldn't matter if Guy used his final technique. The swords master backflipped and literally moved so fast it looked like there were four extra copies of himself.

"Amusing," his opponent muttered.

Ignoring the comment, the give Guy's delivered so many slashes it looked like a whirlwind of blades. Finally to finish it off the boy slashed his iron sword through the neck. Guy then landed a distance away, panting. That took a lot out of him, but it should be over.

"Okay, good shot. I'm almost dead," the soldier replied. Still standing normally in his... 'stance'.

"What do you mean almost dead," Guy yelled in disbelief. "I did three times the damage to you. You should be down!"

"Three times damage?" the soldier muttered to himself as he walked to the tired Guy and stabbed. Then proceeded to stab again.

"What? You can double attack me?" Guy cried.

"Um... yeah. Why would I not want to attack again?"

"Theres no way, I capped my speed!" The boy continued.

"What the heck are you talking about?" His opponent replied as he delivered the final blow.

* * *

Guy opened his eyes again. That man was a cheater, either that or he was officially cursed by the random number goddess.

"Welcome to the-" The arena keeper was completely ignored as Guy ran past and into the open stadium.

"I knew you would come back!" The soldier exclaimed happily. This time he was holding a silver spear.

"What the heck! You hacker!" Guy yelled.

"A what? Hac-" the soldier replied in confusion.

"You have a silver spear," Guy cut him off. What on earth was going on. The game must be broken or something. Do mediocre soldiers even come equipped with silver weapons?

"I always had a silver spear!" His opponent replied, then proceeded to attack.

"No you don't- Wait you get to attack first?" Guy cried out. "I always attack first! Why do you get to attack first?"

"Why?" His opponent echoed, "because I felt like it."

The soldier twirled his lance. Wait, he was doing a critical attack, but soldiers never critical attack! Let alone do any enemies critical on easy mode. Guy never even seen a soldiers critical attack.

"Wait..." Guy muttered.

All he remembered was the familiar crackle of an attack doing three times damage.

"That's not fair, the final chapter was so close too..."

* * *

Guy opened his eyes again and before him was the familiar building of battle. He turned and looked back at camp, he could always choose to just simply walk away...

He then looked back at the stadium.

"Ah what the heck..." He then ran in.

* * *

**Authors Notes:** I wonder what motivated me to make this one shot. Seriously, a fan fiction never works well if a character is aware they are in a game. Like seriously, I remember someone made note of it before in the list of how to ruin a fic in the forums:

"Ike noticed that he had a 60% chance of a critical."

The comment made me lol and I decided that it might actually make a decent story. So here it is, the story of Arena Abuse. We have all done it before, admit it.

Review and add me to your favourite authors to know what my other stories come out. Until then, have a great day.


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